Revenant
by Kohane-chan
Summary: When the sound of carefree laughter turns into the rapid beating of a heart...
1. Prologue

**Revenant**

**Kohane-chan**

"When the sound of carefree laughter

turns into the rapid beating of a heart…"

- - -

"_Autumn leaves are beautiful._

_But dead."_

- - -

**Disclaimer:** I don't own CCS or the song I took the lyrics (_italicized; except for the quote above_) from.

* * *

**Chapter 1: Prologue**

All of us have gone through some kind of illness.

Some of us may have suffered a major illness or injury, others, the minor ones common in childhood.

When we are ill, we come face to face with our limitations. We realize how weak and powerless we are.

Sometimes, this experience could make us more mature because we are more able to discern the essential from the non-essential in life.

While in other cases, the feeling of powerlessness can lead to worry and even anger or despair.

Usually, the latter consequence later on leads to the feeling of hopelessness. Eventually, people succumb to giving up on it and letting it be.

There's nothing wrong with giving up.

Accept that things simply are what they are. Mere hoping won't keep the wind blowing, nor will it turn snow into cotton candy.

There's nothing wrong with giving up.

It's just a way to move on. There's nothing wrong with that. Nothing wrong with forgetting, starting over because we have, and deserve the right to begin anew with ourselves.

But learn when to give up and when to go on.

Sometimes, giving up doesn't necessarily mean to start over. Just set a different goal; possibly one that's smaller and closer and then take it step by step, or settle for something else that could make it work out.

Work with what is, if you want to change things for the better because no one will lie to you more than your imagination.

There's nothing wrong with giving up.

It's just another chance to push everything you don't want troubling you and let it be. It's just a bit tricky to see things from that particular perspective.

A new way to look at the world may be necessary, perhaps.

A new way to look at everything around you would open your eyes to countless possibilities.

There are so many possibilities out there! Why limit yourself to a few? Be open to anything that comes your way!

That desk you've seen practically your whole life? Bend your head and look at it side wards. It looks completely different, doesn't it?

Things look differently from every direction. Just open your eyes and look around you.

The sky above your roof that you've seen forever could look differently when you view it from a different part of the country, or world.

There are so many methods to this.

It's difficult, new and overwhelming.

I should know. I've been there.

It's normal to be skeptic…

I mean a view from the classroom window all the way to a view from a gently humming seat of a speed-defying motorbike…?

How could you or I not be skeptic?

But it's all right.

- -

"_Why? For some reason you look sad._

_Voice, my voice; I hope that it will reach you…"_

_- -

* * *

_

**To be continued…**

Revenant: one that returns after death or a long absence.


	2. Chance Meeting

**Revenant**

**Kohane-chan**

"When the sound of carefree laughter

turns into the rapid beating of a heart…"

- - -

"_Autumn leaves are beautiful._

_But dead."_

- - -

**Disclaimer:** I don't own CCS or the song I took the lyrics (_italicized; except for the quote above_) from.

* * *

**Chapter 2: Chance Meeting**

- -

"_Why? For some reason you look sad._

_Voice, my voice; I hope that it will reach you."_

_- -_

"Hey!"

"Hey!"

Two surprised voices reached my ears, just as a warm, calloused hand gripped the upper arm of my descending form.

Through my fear of hitting my head on hard concrete floor of a small village I've never set foot in all my life before now, all I was aware of was that I didn't want to experience a coma; not now, not ever.

It took me quite a while to realize that I wasn't falling now, and that a hand was gripping onto me to keep me from falling.

- -

"_If it's about things that don't go the way you want them to,_

_there are a lot of them, but…"_

_- -_

I could feel shallow cuts, deep ones and a particularly shallow and long one, running between the middle of the index and middle finger, curving to the bottom left of the palm that was currently holding me in place.

It was all so quick and sudden and very much confusing, I lost awareness only knowing that I had been falling and suddenly, I wasn't, then there was a hand holding onto me.

And just as quite suddenly, I was aware of almost everything near me. But the scene wasn't clear to me. It was only a blur of laughter, talk, movement and colors…a hand, and a soft breath blowing against the crook of my neck.

"It's all right," the stranger told me. My mind quickly judged. He was strange.

People usually **ask** if it's all right. Not reassure you that it's all right when they're not even sure.

But my mind also decided that I like this stranger anyway. I don't know why, nor am I sure if it has anything to do with the fact that he caught me, nor the fact that he saved me from an incoming stampede of tourists (as myself was at the moment) by pulling my out of the way.

"Um…thanks," I stuttered, somehow failing to get my composure back so easily under his gaze.

"Don't bother. But you're welcome anyway!" He smiled. "You just missed the official tour bus though, so I'll take you on a tour instead! It's not free though, but it's not expensive either. So let's get going, shall we?"

I didn't even answer yet, much less processed what was going on yet here I am; holding into his torso for my life as his dark green motorbike went **flying** across the countryside towards either the nearest town or death.

Deciding against screaming, in case I puked, I focused all my effort at closing my legs as to trap my skirt to keep it from revealing what's underneath.

I gave out a sound of annoyance as the speed picked up more. It was painstakingly obvious I wasn't exactly enjoying the ride at its speed but apparently, he didn't give a damn.

I had no choice as the vehicle sped on, but to clutch tighter to his waist, not caring if I wrinkled his green polo shirt right now. It was really uncomfortable, as my nails kept brushing against the buttons of his shirt.

- -

"_If it's about things that don't go the way you want them to,_

_there are a lot of them, but…"_

_- -_

It was half an hour later before the ride slowed to a much needed stop. He got down and I placed both my hands on either side of the leather covered seat as my 'tour guide' just watched me in amusement.

"May I help the lady down?" he asked humorously.

"Gee, who would ever deny a hand from such a gallant, handsome, young gentleman as you…?" I muttered dryly. But I couldn't help but try to calm myself down from that shaky ride.

He gave me that cheeky smile of his.

"Oh wow, is this the part where I swoon?"

He, of all the nerve, laughed as he supported me. Very kind, thanks. But he laughed. That wasn't exactly what I needed right now.

- -

"_If it's about things that don't go the way you want them to,_

_there are a lot of them, but…"_

_- -_

"Just swoon fast, okay? And if you could walk now, follow me fast. I've got a stop over to make and it might take a while. We wouldn't want to be held back any longer from sightseeing, right?" The 'greatest gentleman of the century' winked.

"Aren't tour guides usually kind and put the tourists' business before theirs?"

"As if **I'd** do that! No way," he voiced arrogantly, like a spoiled brat with a tantrum.

"So, are you coming in or not?" He grinned.

As he walked off a little way from his bike, towards an ancient looking wooden store which appeared to be a souvenir shop, I couldn't help but feel somehow drawn to him.

Drawn to the way the autumn wind would gently kiss the feather-like gold brown and gold strands of his hair.

Drawn to the way the autumn breeze picked and flirted with the loose, pale-green cloth of his sleeves as his arms swung almost barely by his sides as with each step.

Drawn to how greatly the autumn surroundings made him look like a misplaced angel as he walked on crunched up gold, brown, and red leaves as an angel would on the silver, white, and blue clouds in the skies.

Drawn to the complete stranger himself.

But not drawn enough to forget his arrogance.

It would've been such a beautiful scene for a story now formulating in her mind. How a misunderstood angel accidentally falls down to earth, and how he captured the hearts of many in his own ways, yet never letting anyone dance too closely…

It could've been wonderful. And the words had already formed itself, weaved itself into sentences, paragraphs, a beautiful project and novel right inside my mind.

But that was then, this was now. He was arrogant. How could he be the prince, the angel, the knight, the thief of so many people's hearts with even his slightest smile when he even left her outside like this!

My eyes grew watery from all the dust and the displays.

Countless carved wood figurines displayed neatly on shelves. Some were colored, some were left plain. But they were all beautiful.

Along the walls were drawn portraits and painted landscapes.

I never cared much for paintings since I could never paint myself so I don't and never will see what's so special about famous paintings and such. But I can't help but to admire these ones.

I looked around the shop to admire the figurines while my tour guide talked to an old man I presumed to be the shopkeeper.

It took me a while to realize that someone was watching me until I turned to him and the shopkeeper, both of whom laughed when they saw that I finally realized that they were watching me browse around the whole time.

I flushed under their gaze, feeling uncomfortable.

"Was there anything you liked there?" the shopkeeper asked me.

"Well…I," I didn't really know what to say. But his encouraging eyes made me a bit more comfortable. I swear it had nothing to do with my 'tour guide' flashing me a thumbs up with that irritating arrogant air of his.

I walked towards a small round table that had small wooden racks, upon which were small carved wood with various shapes, fashioned into key chains.

I picked up a particular rose key chain that was carved with much care and coated professionally with varnish.

The outline was smoothly cut, and the petals were done with great detail.

"Is this for sale? And how much is it if it is?" I smiled cheerfully. It was really cute after all, and I'm sure it was made by a very talented, determined carver! Someone who emits such a friendly personality must have created this key chain.

"Ah, that's one of a kind. I still remember, it was the fourteenth of October when that key chain was brought in by my supplier to give as a gift to my nine year old daughter…"

I listened to him tell me about how his daughter absolutely loved this rose…

I didn't understand though, if she loved it so much, why was her father selling it? And why was the arrogant guy smirking at me as the old man continued his tale…?

"…She died last year, in an accident in which she got lost and her body was found later. It seems she fell and hit her head on a rock," the old man sighed sadly.

I gasped as I walked over to him and placed the rose key chain on his hands.

"You should keep it then. I'm really sorry," I apologized. I felt guilty that I brought back horrible memories to him. If it's not me, it's either someone else who remembers something bad. I really am a jinx.

I was almost crying as I thought about how horrible it was for this old man, when I felt an arm wrap itself on my shoulders and a hand pry open my own to place the rose in it.

"Go on, keep it. I'm sure she would've wanted you to have it," the old man encouraged me.

"But I couldn't. It's your daughter's after all," I protested weakly.

The old man chuckled at my stubbornness and replied, "Well, why don't we just ask the one who carved it to judge who of us keeps it, then?"

"This young lady keeps it then! That's settled! Off we go to do some sightseeing then! Bye then Mister!"

"Whoa-! Wait! **You** made this? There's no way you made this!" I gasped.

"Get over it. Come on then. You'll get to see some sights before we get to my place. You could sleep there tonight then I'll take you around tomorrow since it's getting late," he smirked as he dragged me back to his bike.

"Be quick then, I'll take you to my place, okay?"

Without waiting for an answer, again, threw his spare helmet to me and waited for me to get on.

I sighed, defeated.

I came here to think of a way to get back on my feet. I came here to avoid being pressured to give up. I don't want to give up so I came here to recollect my will.

Recollecting my mind and will didn't actually include practically expecting that the last moments of my life are spent on this leather seat of a motorbike with a guy who doesn't give a damn for speed limits.

I only thought this would be horrible at first. But looking at it in another way… maybe this could help me somehow.

I had to give this guy a chance since he helped me after all.

I'll give this a try and trust him. He can't all be arrogant and speed-defying. He must have other qualities too, I guess.

"All right…" I whispered my reply to his earlier question.

But I guess, with the roaring wind, he didn't hear me. But I didn't mind.

Instead, I smiled.

- -

"_Tomorrow a different wind will blow and_

_we'll feel it in our hearts with hands wide open._

_Through things beat down on us, though they may torture us,_

_We'll be all right."_

_- -_

"…_Watashi-tachi wa daijobu…"_

_- -

* * *

_

**To be continued…**


	3. Let it Be

Dedicated to a dear friend of mine who put up with me and helped improve my work while I was too lazy to read it for errors.

(I hope you're feeling all right.)

-

**Revenant**

**Kohane-chan**

"When the sound of carefree laughter

turns into the rapid beating of a heart…"

- - -

"_Autumn leaves are beautiful._

_But dead."_

- - -

**Disclaimer:** I don't own CCS or the song I took the lyrics (_italicized; except for the quote above_) from.

* * *

**Chapter 3: Finale: Let it be**

- -

"_Tomorrow a different wind will blow and_

_we'll feel it in our hearts with hands wide open._

_Through things beat down on us, though they may torture us,_

_We'll be all right."_

_- -_

Thick, scarlet red liquid slowly made its way downward, sliding from the base of the thumb, dripping into the smooth, polished, cold wooden floor.

"Oh…"

"Oh? That's all you have to say? You injure yourself, how many times and you just say 'oh'?"

"It doesn't really matter. I've been injured before. Though it's nice that you care about me!" he winked at me.

I simply rolled my eyes and went back to my book.

After seeing tour guide guy's house, I found it easier to accept that he made the key chain. His house literally screamed about it. With all the necessary materials around and all the finished works just waiting to be varnished, it was easier to swallow that he really did make the rose.

There were quite a lot of wood shavings inside a black trash bag outside his house and there was a lot of touched and untouched wood inside.

"It's a bit late to ask, but, what brings you to this place anyway?" He asked out of the blue as he fixed the angles of his current project.

"I just needed some time alone. Can I try that?" I asked, gesturing to his hands as they carved away at the wood.

He tossed me a rectangular piece of wood and handed me a pocket knife similar to his.

After marking the last page I was reading in my book, I observed the rectangle block of wood and thought of what I wanted to carve that was easy for me.

After some thought, I smiled and picked up the pocket knife and he paused to watch me.

"How is it?" I asked, proud.

"What is it?" He asked, perplexed.

"It's a cube!"

"You just chopped off half of it!"

"What's your point?"

He laughed, clutching his sides. What?!

"But look! Use your imagination! If I just turn it a bit like this," I started, demonstrating all the while, "it looks like a diamond shape! See?"

- -

"_Fine; Every time you get rid of your worries,_

_Heart, your heart; it will get stronger."_

_- -_

Unable to stop his laughter, and seemingly want to show me he was better, (arrogant jerk!) he continued on what he was working on before pausing to watch me, allowing me to see the way his hands nimbly cut and carved to achieve whatever it is he wanted.

But still in his state of amusement, he accidentally cut off a part of what looked like a fish's fin to me, and then swore.

"Great, now I have to start over…" he sighed sadly.

"Wait! What do you mean start over? You're just giving up because you made a mistake?" I asked incredulously. Just because of one thing that didn't go his way, he was giving up?!

… One thing that didn't go **my** way… because of that… I'm here in this place. But I'm not like him! I'm not giving up… right? I'm just… just… gathering up what's left of me. Just stalling for a while… It can't be the same… right? Right…?

"It's hopeless. I can't just glue it back on or something." He replied as he picked it up, heading outside towards a black trash bag.

"Wait! You can't do that. Make up a story for it instead! How about it's some sort of heroic dolphin that lost its fin trying to save its young, or something? You can't just throw something as good as that away!" I had a lot more to say but before I could say more, he stopped and turned slowly to me. I don't know if I was scared or just feeling really off today…

"You're just like her, aren't you? Great, now all I need to find out is that you want to be an author someday too…?" He looked at me straight.

I blinked in surprise.

He sighed.

"You really do?"

I nodded before following him back to his house.

"Look, there's nothing wrong with giving up, you know? Merely hoping won't keep the wind blowing, nor will it turn snow into cotton candy." He sighed as he placed the dolphin and its broken fin in my hands.

"But learn when to give up and when to go on!" I retorted. This guy could be too one-sided.

"You're too imaginative. Learn to keep your head out of the clouds. It's broken already."

"Work with what is if you want to change things for the better. No one will lie to you more than your imagination," I muttered the last few words softer than I intended.

How could someone as close minded as him make such beautiful carvings?

"What does it have to do with my imagination?"

"It has to do with everything! What's on your mind is the perfect dolphin, isn't it? So now that you made a mistake, now that something didn't go your way, in your mind, it's broken because it didn't turn out as you imagined it would. So you proclaim it broken. Am I wrong?"

"Exactly like her. Damn… Fine!" He surrendered, "It's the great dolphin hero, ya-! Ouch!"

I stuck out my tongue. I threw the broken piece of the dolphin's fin at his head. It's small but still wood. It's still possible to cause damage.

"Great. I got a double of her. Grab a swim suit if you have one and let's go." He gestured his thumb toward the door leading to his garage… Where his motorbike was… Damn.

"What? Where are you taking me? But it's almost midnight!"

"Better make it quick then princess. I'm your tour guide, right? So let's go sightseeing already! If you don't change into your swimsuit in that bathroom right now, I'm changing you myself."

"Pervert! I don't even want to swim!" I retorted before dashing into the bathroom.

* * *

I closed my eyes tightly as his motorbike rode **roughly** over broken twigs and dry leaves. 

So far, he managed to convince me not to get off the bike as he rode through the forest.

"We're here princess."

I opened my eyes to see a place seemingly out of a fairytale. Even though there was no princess castle on the other side of the lake… it was still magnificent and very much beautiful. Not to mention peaceful.

I was about to comment when I heard a splash and cold water hit my face. Even though it wasn't quite winter yet, the incoming breath of the winter has pretty much swept over the bodies of water in this country.

It isn't exactly convenient to have near-freezing water splashed in your face near midnight.

And the guy whom I've long figured out was way older than me, was swimming in the lake; at way below average temperature. And he wanted me to swim here?

"Don't tell me you're sensitive to cold temperature?"

I grinned heartily at him. And instead of replying verbally, I took off my loose shirt and slid off my skirt I used to cover up my 2 piece. And dived, deliberately aiming to have him splashed as well.

I saw him shaking his head, very much like a lost wet puppy.

"Oh haha…" He muttered sourly. "I almost drowned you know? I swallowed up a lot of water."

"Get over it! You started it!"

He laughed along with me as we both swam and played around. At one point he got the clothes I brought wet.

I got tired after a while, and I suppose he did too (I'm not sure if he ever gets tired).

So I relaxed in the water and he floated next to me so we just talked for a while.

I noted quite some time ago that we were totally different.

He was more carefree and I was too shy.

But he commented that I could really be carefree and not so stiff and boring (arrogant idiot!) After spending more time with me and getting involved with me.

And I realized he was flushing as he said this, so I realized he has his shy side too. Only unlike me, he doesn't hide who he is.

"You're exactly like her, you know that?" he asked suddenly as he stepped at the bottom of the lake instead of floating himself.

"Maybe I'd actually know, if I actually understood what you were actually talking about?" I asked dryly.

He just laughed at me so I stood up as well, well; tried to since I realized that I couldn't reach the bottom.

I thought I was about to drown when a pair of arms suddenly wrapped against my waist.

"Thanks."

"Definitely like her."

It was getting frustrated being compared to someone only he knew.

"My girlfriend, that is. Well, actually, now it's ex girlfriend. I broke up with her when she left the country to…to pursue being an author in another country since they paid higher there. You're like her in the way you think, act and what you want."

"Oh…I…I see." I felt awkward. I didn't know what to say to a guy I didn't even know tell me about his ex.

He just stood there as he held me against him as I couldn't stand up. And we talked, for some odd reason.

He told me a lot of things. How bad it was when he was trying to convince his girlfriend that she should just give up on it and just pursue being an author in the country instead. But she was raised in a poor family so she vowed to herself that she'll have a better life when she was older. She would have a job that paid high so that she could live in comfort…

How disoriented he became when she suggested that they just maintain a long-distance relationship. How he flat out refused and just broke up with her and left her standing in the rain, to process what just happened between them…

He told me a lot of things.

He continued on to how he realized his mistake and told himself he wouldn't give up on her, and they had a disagreement. Much like the one they had a couple hours ago in his house about what we should and shouldn't give up on.

How depressed he was when she left, and how he gave up and started all over again, eventually forgetting her…

And those things he told me were painful, I could see that.

But still, I wondered…

"How could you smile?"

"It's just about pushing everything you don't want troubling you and to let it be."

I was still confused. I didn't get it.

"Change is overwhelming princess. In fact, my change was so overwhelming it overwhelmed me to smile, so I smiled and just kept it that way! See? That's why my face hurts all the time!" He exclaimed so happily, then laughing not too long later.

So I just laughed along with him.

- -

"_Fine; Every time you get rid of your worries,_

_Heart, your heart; it will get stronger."_

_- -_

I laughed before I told him my own worries back home.

I told him about my problems I had in school, in my (non-existent) love life and how I'm not sure I could be an author.

I told him about the guy I admired from afar, I told him my opinion of him, that he was confusing even for someone like me who had an answer to everything, for someone who could distinguish easily each personality and could trace it back to why the person was like so.

How he was like an autumn leaf to me. His color was ever-changing and confusing to understand why he was the way he was. And how I didn't even know myself what attracted me to him. I doubt it had to do with he was a teacher, and very much reminded me of my father and mother. Only he was seeing someone else.

I confessed that I went away, ran away, to try and get my old passion back to love him. So that it would give me more reason to stand up for what I wanted, that I didn't know if I should even let this continue or give up, that I felt that even my feelings for him right now was also like an autumn leaf; ever-changing, beautiful, fallen away.

"Autumn leaves are beautiful, princess. But dead." He replied simply.

He helped me get back to shore and we sat there, laughing just because he felt like it and I felt like I needed it. He put his jacket around me as we just watched the sun rise, warming and drying both of us.

- -

"_The vastness of the sky, and the strength of the sunlight;_

_Don't you feel them deep in your heart?"_

_- -_

I didn't get to clear my mind after all. I'm still confused but not for the same reason.

And I learned something… well, quite a lot of things, actually.

Life really looks different when you look at it from different points.

Like when you look at it from the place where the sound of your laughter, turned into the rapid beating of a heart.

"Have you realized yet we haven't introduced ourselves?" I asked with great amusement before we both broke out into laughter.

"Ah, took you long enough to get there. Ladies first then," he winked at me.

I rolled my eyes and replied, "Sakura. And now may the gentleman introduce himself?"

He turned away from the sunrise to look at me in the eye, and smiled. His gold-brown bangs fluttering in time with the autumn breeze, his brown eyes shining with warmth like the sun.

"Syaoran."

* * *

**END.**

In case no one noticed or realized yet, this is actually the _final_ finale or sequel to the rose trilogy.

This is the end. I doubt I'll write anything following this plotline. So if anyone's taken an interest, feel free to write your own version to what happened to them afterwards if you like as long as you send me a link to it.


End file.
